Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Brrrr........


It's very cold here at the moment.

And The Pink House is to insulation what Aldi Supermarket is to lobster thermidour in white truffle sauce.

Due to a shortage, people barter blankets like prisoners trading cigarettes; it's a form of currency in here.

Pssst. Over here.....do you want a blanket?

How much?

Well, let's say you do my washing up. How's that?

No deal. I'll do your plate, but your saucepan has rice burned on to the bottom.

OK. Wash the plate, dry it, put the saucepan into soak and the blanket's yours.

Done

Sucker

The temperature isn't particularly low, but there's something unsettling about being in a country famed for its heat, but spending your time wondering whether your teeth might be shattering through chattering.

In England at least we have the facilities to cope with sub-par weather. Years of drizzly afternoons and blustery evenings have led to the development of the East Midlands Electricity Storage Heater (as advertised by Brian Clough) and the Calor Gas Fire.

No such luck in Oz. After all what do you need them for? Just grin and bear it as the wind whistles up your board shorts.

People have also taken to filling huge 4 pint milk cartons with boiling water from the super-heated nozzle/billabong in the kitchen (which saves boiling the kettle 554 times a day). They then sit out back hugging the boiling cartons like teddy bears with their sleeves pulled over their palms so as not to burn themselves.

By the morning the wooden tables at the back resemble some modern art exhibition with 30 plastic cartons of clear liquid, complete with their variety of coloured lids, strewn artistically and chaotically around the courtyard.

We are in the midst of the Australian Winter, I hope it hurries up.

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